It Is What It Is

“It Is What It Is”

Seems like it must have been good.  Here they are, Jon & Don, licking their pie plates.

A recent trip to visit Pie Pal friends, Kristin and Jon, took us to their cabin in southern Chile.  Their friends Don and JoAnne (from Montana) are building a home nearby.  With all of us being there together, the occasion called for pie.  Three pies, in fact, in 3 weeks:  blueberry, apple, blueberry, each one adapted to fit the circumstances and ingredients available. 

That’s one of the things I’ve learned over time:  the value of being flexible and adapting.  Being a rather fixed person (my partner might kindly call me strong-willed), it’s been a challenge for me to let go of my own expectations for how things should be.  This “how things should be” framework has two sides:  caring enough to do a really good job on whatever it is, like making a perfect pie for the state fair pie contest, and knowing when to be more in the moment with what is and what is possible and what is good enough.  Sometimes, as Kristin says, “It is what it is.”

How has this change in myself – this willingness to be more in the flow – come about?  Self-compassion.  This self-compassion is about a willingness to see life through kinder eyes, to see myself through kinder eyes: to love this simply human self.  It is about accepting whatever is going on in the moment, taking time to breathe and enjoy this life as it is.

That’s the thing:  It is what it is.  In the moment, we can’t change what is, we can only see it – see the situation, see ourselves, see others – honestly, with compassion, with love, and then go on from there. 

So, 3 pies in 3 weeks: baking in unfamiliar kitchens with stoves that measured heat in Celsius rather than Fahrenheit, making do with the tools on hand [Yikes!  No pie server!], and using the ingredients that were available there, tucked way back in the Andes.  One pie (blueberry #1) was made with my preferred thickening agent brought along with me from home; the apple pie was made with fresh, local green apples piled high (it was Fall there!); and finally, the pastry dough for the last one (blueberry #2) was rolled out in Santiago with a wine bottle (in the absence of a rolling pin).  It was a wonderful feeling to be open creatively and to have the experience of going with what was there.

Here’s to making pie with what’s available, putting love into it, sharing it with new & old friends, and expanding compassion for ourselves and others.  And thank you for reminding me, Kristin!